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October 24th, 2005
04:41 pm - Fallout: Brotherhood of SHIT
since i have NOTHING relevent to ever document in this silly thing, i'm going to use it to tell the world (read: 4-5 people) about the shitty (or gold!) videogames i come across.
today i've been playing a bit of Fallout: Brotherhood of Steel. i'm about 5 hours into it and let me tell you it's utter garbage. as a game, it's only slightly above average, but it's a pox upon the rich and detailed Fallout universe. they've taken out all the tongue-in-cheek humor and replaced it with FART JOKES AND SEXUAL INNUENDO, they kill off an important story character like it was nothing, DARE to personify the silent main character you played in Fallout 1 (nicknamed WASTELAND STRANGER), and the writers must have been drunk or high (probably both) when writing the script. if you're looking for an action hack n' slash, get it as it's only $10 but serious fallout fans BEWARE. this game will destroy your brain cells.
i also started replaying (AGAIN... 10th time?) baldur's gate. i'm cursed with game; every time i replay it i get about 1 hour from beating it then something happens and i start all over again. it's been that way for 5 FUCKING YEARS. yea.
Current Mood: brr
Current Music: pseudo-silk kimono
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October 11th, 2005
09:42 pm - STEEL WERE R U
I WILL FIND OUT WHERE YOU LIVE SOON ENOUGH STEEL PALADINE
MYSTERY INDIAN MAN
my cousin who goes to NCU or whatever that university in raleigh is called keeps on telling me about this cool indian guy who could possibly be sredni
SOON I WILL DIVULGE YOUR LOCATION FROM HIM AND WE WILL PARTY LIKE IT IS 1999-2005
won't that be gr9?
>:3
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October 6th, 2005
11:52 am - deja vu
the other day i witnessed an event that unfolded in my life several years into the future
time isn't sequential, we move forwards and backwards in tenths of a tenth of a second
the game of cards i played today will be played tomorrow
i have a paperbag filled with clear mountain air
man i am too laid back and never worry about anything. experience has taught me that things just magically (or divinely hoho) fall in place
as i need them. not a care in the woooooorld
Current Mood: ![[mood icon]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/mood/classic/smile.gif) satisfied
Current Music: marilon
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October 3rd, 2005
10:47 am - BREAKFAST TIME IS!?!?!?!
i fucking hate updating this thing because life is so damn boring
but this new commercial has been playing nonstop where a fork, a spoon, and a plate RAP about breakfast. now this isn't any ordinary rap, it's a shitty rap (woah redundancy) with wonky words like "BACON EGGS AND CHEESY, FUCKING OVEREASY!!!!" and it includes the worse voice actors my poor ears have ever heard. i don't need a blast to the past and a trip down the early 90s lane to know that breakfast is good for me. just give me a damn donut and let that be that.
Current Mood: cheesed
Current Music: BREKFAST TIME IS????
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September 18th, 2005
09:13 am - postmodern
"Trying to control information in the network age is about as successful as pissing into the wind"
-Keith Henson
After starting to replay MGS2 and Earthbound I've got this craving for postmodern literature. Ugh, I have to call Borders and see if they got my copy of A Wild Sheep Chase.
Current Mood: aroused
Current Music: i hate music
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September 16th, 2005
12:16 pm - THIS VIDEO WILL CHANGE YOUR FUCKING LIVES
ohmanohmanohman
Chacarron Macarron
This is the single greatest song (and music video) known to man. Watch it and be amazed by it's sheer brilliance. I will listen to know other. This makes Hendrix obsolete. Good day. Sentence fragment.
Here are the amazing and thought provoking lyrics:
oooooooohuuu yehaaaaaa …. sea.. sou.. jhonn macarron.. yeah macarron nooon
Chacarron, Chacarron, Chacarron, Chacarron , ualuealuealeuale ualuelaelaellalea, alsualsualualauusualulus ,,,alsualsualualauusualulus …
Chacarron, Chacarron, aliluliron,, Chacarron, Chacarron, aliluliron ,, Chacarron, n’ ,, Chacarron, ,, aliluliron ,, Chacarron, Chacarron, aliluliron,,
ualuealuealeuale ualuelaelaellalea, alsualsualualauusualulus ,,,alsualsualualauusualulus …
ualuealuealeuale ualuelaelaellalea, alsualsualualauusualulus ,,,alsualsualualauusualulus …
Chacarron, Chacarron, aliluliron,, Chacarron, Chacarron, aliluliron ,, Chacarron, n’ ,, Chacarron, ,, aliluliron ,, Chacarron, Chacarron, aliluliron,,
Chacarron, Chacarron, Chacarron, Chacarron , ualuealuealeuale ualuelaelaellalea, alsualsualualauusualulus ,,,alsualsualualauusualulus …
Chacarron, Chacarron, aliluliron,, Chacarron, Chacarron, aliluliron ,, Chacarron, n’ ,, Chacarron, ,, aliluliron ,, Chacarron, Chacarron, aliluliron,,
aluealuealeuale ualuelaelaellalea, alsualsualualauusualulus ,,,alsualsualualauusualulus …ualuealuealeuale ualuelaelaellalea, alsualsualualauusualulus ,,,alsualsualualauusualulus …
Chacarron, Chacarron, aliluliron,, Chacarron, Chacarron, aliluliron ,, Chacarron, n’ ,, Chacarron, ,, aliluliron ,, Chacarron, Chacarron, aliluliron,,
Chacarron, Chacarro,, Chacarron, Chacarro,, Chacarron, Chacarro,
Current Mood: UALEULAEULAE
Current Music: Chacarron Macarron
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September 14th, 2005
10:06 am - uuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuh
GOD DAMN HOW DO I NOT DROWN IN MY OWN SEA OF MEDIOCRITY???????????
Current Mood: WHATS THE POINT
Current Music: FUCK MUSIC
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September 8th, 2005
06:23 am - boring
Man, life is boring. Why can't shit blow up around me and bullets fly in slow motion while hot women strip for my pleasure? Seriously, every day is dull and gray (I'm a rapper, ch-check out that rhyme). If only my life was an ACTION MOVIE...
Or I could transfer to the Marines and duke it out in the front lines...
I choose boring and gray.
Current Mood: gyuh
Current Music: uh
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September 1st, 2005
07:01 am - I KNEW IT I KNEW IT
I told all of my unbelieving friends at the recruiting office that gas prices would rise 35-50cents within the next 7 days as a result to the hurricane. I even showed them fucking charts and demographics as well as pointing out that several oil refineries and pipelines exist off the gulf and yet they STILL didn't believe me. Well now it's thursday and gas is at it's highest in my area at $2.99 (which is pretty cheap compared to 95% of every other area). Let me just go out and say this right now: WHATEVER THE GAS COMPANIES SAY IS BULLSHIT. I'm serious. I know it's pretty cliche to yell out "LOL GAS CONSPIRACY" but the companies have us by the balls. They're using this "broken pipeline" shit as a scam to rake in the cash. Some people are like "Lol let's boycott" but you can't; we rely on gas too much.
That out of the way, this hurricane took a pretty heavy toll on New Orleans. I never understood why a city 1 inch BELOW SEA LEVEL would ever become popular some 100 years ago but hey, people like living ON THE EDGE!!! (er, to the XTREME: note the X instead of 'ex'). The death toll is predicted to be over the 1,000 and some 50,000+ are still trapped and/or missing or so they say. I have yet to hear much from the Naval base, but a lot of big time rappers have decided they give a damn (uh... about their image, yea) and are throwing concerts to raise money. Problem is, how are you honestly going to house 200,000 people in one place and keep civil law when the cops themselves are looting stores for shrunken heads and other New Orleans voodoo apparel.
Man, crushing depression just kicked in. My liscense tags are expired. My hair needs to be washed. I feel so EEEEEEEEEEMO. I'm going to go pet my knife and listen to LINKIN PARK.
Current Mood: meh
Current Music: CRAAAWLING IN MY SKIIIIN
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August 28th, 2005
08:20 pm - hmmmm games
I just beat Alien Hominid a few minutes ago and I'm now in love with the work of Dan Paladin and Tom Fulp. Seriously, it's amazing that a team of like... 15 can make a game that tops 90% of the shit that gets released today. I thought it was a bit lacking in the sound effect department (and there were a few, looping music tracks that got old after a while) but the game was incredibly well polished and there's plenty of unlockables to keep me busy for a few weeks. The best part, it's only $20 NEW!!!
p.s. This game has the best last boss EVER.
For some reason I feel like playing the Deus Ex series again. Something within me wants CONSPIRACY!!!
I noticed a lot of things these days have the word "kettle" on them... maybe that's the new buzzword for "crunchy" because that's about all that's different.
Current Mood: peachy
Current Music: i dont like music
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August 27th, 2005
06:25 pm - WOOT PAST MEDICAL
Today I went into MEPS (Medical Entrance Processing) for a medical inspection and job transfer. After 7 days of starving myself and excersising like a madman, I passed with 21% body fat (max is 22%). I also managed to snag the job that was promised me almost a year ago. Instead of training for Master at Arms (leader in the military's police force), for the next 6 years I will working as an ATFIC (Advance Technical Field Communications Technician) starting December 12. My job is to check and repair various batteries, communications equipment, video and audio equipment, and alarms. I'll probably also be signing up to be on a submarine for extra pay and visits to more exotic locales (subs frequently visit all the cool docks). Joyous day it is.
Current Mood: NO LONGER HUNGRY!!!
Current Music: um... none
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August 26th, 2005
11:16 am - oh man so tired
I've been going through rough physical training the past 7 days and I haven't eaten a good, wholesome meal since. I've lost about 10 pounds and 3% body fat since and I can say I'm pretty damn proud (and sore). The things I do for my country.
Speaking of which, I noticed something that I'm beginning to hate; SPECIAL TREATMENT. Yes, I am in the military, and yes, it often feels weird sometimes. Any soldier can tell you that you feel alienated from society like the whole world either stares at you in awe or spits at you in utter disgust. I began to notice this when I went to Busch Gardens (a theme park modeled after several European countries). They were having some "HONOR THE SOLDIERS" day where anyone with a military ID could get in free. Having a season pass, I really didn't care until I noticed one thing that really disturbed me; EVERY FUCKING EVENT WAS SPECIFICALLY DEDICATED TO SOLDIERS.
Ask a physically or mentally challenged person if "people treat you different" and you'll most likely hear "lol yes." I thought it would be nice to be treated like a king but in reality IT SUCKS. In highschool, there's this common practice of asking young adults what they'll be doing with their lives. As the teachers points their fingers down the row of desks and nods their heads everytime they hear the name of a prestigious university or Ivy League school, the proverbial record scratch goes off when they point to me and hear "um... military?" I immediately get several nasty looks or nods of admiration but the question is WHY? I remember one girl saying "Doing the devil's dirty work, eh?" and I answered with "Every time you pay your taxes you're doing the 'devil's dirty work'."
Why is it that a simple career (yes, this is a career and nothing more) is treated so awkwardly in todays society? Sure, a soldier/sailor/airman's job is hazardous but SOMEBODY HAS TO DO IT, right? We're a generation that has experienced too much comfort and the media has drilled this constantly into our minds. Suddenly, when a war approaches, everyone flips out. War has been around since the dawn of man and standing armies are just as old. We shouldn't look at different people's choice of career as something to frown or praise. As creatures with free will, we make choices and live our lives accordingly. There's no difference in fighting than there is paying taxes; it all goes to one source and that's what keeps governments thriving. To me, a business tycoon in a blue suit is no different than a marine in olive drab; every day we wear our uniforms and every day we fight our own battles whether they're physical or mental.
Meh, maybe it's just the hunger ranting. I'm going to pig out tomorrow.
Current Mood: ![[mood icon]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/mood/classic/sad.gif) hungry
Current Music: BOB THE BUILDER
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August 23rd, 2005
02:18 pm - i liek soap
Originally I was going to post a longwinded essay on the seductive qualities of SOAP but I decided to refrain.
Physical Training in an hour... JOY! I'm so out of shape. You'd never expect someone so fat to be defending your country TAX DOLLARS AT WORK.
On a side NOTE: I had this eery, surreal dream last night. Most of the details escape me (like most dreams, hoho) but I'll try to recall what I remember. Basically, it involved me staring down a dark alley that ended with a brick wall. Living by the brick wall, in a cardboard box was a small boy in khaki shorts and a white T-shirt with a red baseball cap and a baseball bat that said "kaiptain kid k" which could only mean that this Kaptain Kid batted 1,000 (hence the K... but it also stood for KKK WTF?!?). Anyways, KKK's alley wall was filled with various pictures of superhero cards pasted onto the wall. The only light in the alley came in from a defective traffic light that was always red... ALWAYS.
It was kind of... weird (DARE I SAY POSTMODERN HOHO). Either way, the dream ended with the boy slowly standing up and raising his bat at me, switched to a scene where a guy's head was crushed by a car wheel, a fake cnn style report about crazy humanoid robots being violently deactivated, and a final scene with a female android on a harley davidson telling KKK that it's necessary for her kind to be dismantled. The final dialog bits happened as KKK climbed on the back of the female android's harley:
Female Android: "When the light turns green, we'll fly into space and escape it all."
KKK: "But... the light is always red. Time abandoned this spot a long time ago."
Female: "I'm a superhero, kid. Trust in me."
KKK: "*something that sounded like OPHELIA*, I love y-"
They both gasp
Green light
Shit that was weird. MY NANOWRIMO STORY HOHOHO.
I need a psychologist.
Current Mood: Convoluted
Current Music: Jack Black: RAWKAH!1
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August 22nd, 2005
06:16 pm - oh man i hate action movies
Today I was having a scintillating conversation with my friend on ACTION MOVIES. Apparently, he thinks them the greatest thing since sliced cheese. Personally, I think they're shit. Doesn't mean I won't spend my hard earned sawbuck on a good action fest, but to say they're "Intelligent pieces of work derived from the minds of geniuses" is about as big of an understatement OVERSTATEMENT as saying "STAR WARS is the driving force behind science fiction." Either way, I challenged him to a MOVIE STANDOFF to prove that the shit we see on the silver screen is just that; filth (er, shit).
First, let's come up with a title. It usually needs to include something involving guns and explosions as well as poor grammar and overly bad cliches.
How about...
BULLET TO FACE, DIE IN FIRE
Yea, the highschoolers will like that...
Next you start off with a vaguely identifiable scene that introduces the badguy and his bumbling cohorts. This usually involves some item that is rarely mentioned or some plot device you'll usually forget about near the end of the movie and takes place in a setting that no one can understand. Why is the highly sophisticated Englishman talking about "the STUFF" in the middle of a warehouse filled with swetty gangsters? Obviously he thinks he badass enough to take down two dozen mobsters. Honestly, who cares.
From there we have the hardboiled detective ON THE EDGE OF THE LAW who is given a ridiculous name that usually combines an animal with an object or an empowering adjective. My hero, in this case, is JACK LIONSTONE. It combines the RAW POWER of a lion with the SHEER MAGNITUDE AND HARDNESS of a stone. Brilliant. I should be hired on the spot. Oh yea, every member of the heroes family is murdered and/or kidnapped. No exceptions. Did I mention John Everyman will almost always have exagerated facial hair and a haircut so outrageous it could only be contained in a MULLET or PERM. As a general rule; black actors are bald or have buzzcuts while white actors sport inanely long manes that flow in the wind and bring out their glaring eyes.
From here, our hero follows a vague lead given to him from some bum on the street as he goes on a rampage. The cops never ask questions, the badguys never bother to run, and ordinary shit like barrels and plastic armchairs explode in glorious fashion. All action scenes use various forms of stop and slow mo at moments no matter how appropriate. The hero could be taking a piss and we'll see every drop slowly flow from his JOHN in stunningly detailed SLOW MO. It's like time is a dirty slut with herpes and refuses to touch our dirty, mangled hero who can accurately blow someone's head off with a blow gun from 500 yards away while a guy with a machine gun misses him from point blank. Oh yea, no exceptions. If the hero ever gets shot, it's usually in the arm or grazes his shoulder. That's how BADASS he truly is. So badass that one-liners that would sound ridiculous in any situation suddenly sound COOL.
Finally, after chasing after cryptic lead after cryptic lead, we have the final showdown with the poorly detailed badguy who had no other point in the story but to be an angry face that spouts out political or economic talk. Using words like "BIG BUSINESS" and "BUDGET CUTS" he explains to the hero that he killed his girlfriend/daughter/mother/uncle/barber because they were meddling in his business (of course; civilians always investigate the going ons of business tycoons and mobsters). In this showdown, all guns are tossed out the window so the two characters can duke it out hand to hand. Murderous one-liners and slow motion abound; this fight is so phenomenal, so expensive that yes, time cannot touch it. The hero spits blood on the ground... IN SLOW MO. The villain flips the hero off... IN SLOW MO. Eventually the villain dies... because that's his job. No matter what advantage he has, he will always find some way to succumb whether it's by heavy machinery or his own vitriolic script. That's the way the world turns.
As the scene fades and the credits role accompanied by HEAVY METAL RAWKAH!1 we're treated to the cast of big budget actors and a small village worth of stuntment and costume designers. We slowly leave the theater, head boggled by the poor ending (which usually ends with a obvious clue as to the villains survival), teeth rotten with popcorn kernels, and gum on our shoes. Yet... despite the shit that just got dumped on our heads, we can't help but say "FUCKING AWESOME" and turning to our friends to recite our favorite scenes in glorious detail even though we just saw it like 5 minutes ago. Thus repeats the savage cycle.
Fuck action movies...
I'm going to go watch CHRONICLES OF RIDDICK...
p.s. I won the bet with my friend; he actually LIKED my idea. Disgusting.
p.p.s. I left out things like big breasted chicks with exceptionally developed scripts like "YOU BITCH" and "HARDER" but that's a gimme.
Current Mood: satiated?
Current Music: whatevers playing on tv
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August 21st, 2005
07:50 pm - um... whut?
Nothing new or interesting today... I guess I should rewind and HEAD INTO THE PAST
-My money is running dry
-I feel lack of inspiration to do anything (er... apathy?)
-I learned that parents, no matter how old or responsible you are, pester you to no end
-Gas is too fucking pricey
-It's National Novel Writing Month (NaNoWriMo)
I think I'll write something... er, POSTMODERN. Yes, like an American version of Earthbound... or something. I still have a weak to iron this mess out.
Current Mood: intrigued?
Current Music: I HAET SONG!
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03:32 am - power ranger MURDERS
hey remember
-no me neither
okay, back way back when in like... 1995 there was a show called POWER RANGERS RARGH!
yea well a star on the show murdered someone
^i no isn't it awesome!
GO GO POWER RANGERS!! MIGHTY MORPHINE POWR RANGRSZ
ookay, upon further research i have learned that ths guy wasn't a power ranger rather an extra in an episode
^aw seriously?
^lol yse
but still, tying people to cinder blocks and throwing them in the ocean? what kind of sick mind can contemplate!
^gangsters?
the ocean is for fishing and dumping garbage DO NOT DISRESPECT IT WITH BODIES BECAUSE YOU WANT A YACHT OKAy?
^maybe the rich people were garbage?
good point, i wholeheartedly agree!
:)
Current Mood: some kind of awesome!
Current Music: Home: Dream Theater
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03:01 am - oh man where am i?
THROUGH CONVENIENT SEARCHING OF THE INTERNET (YES SCARY) I HAVE COME ACROSS A WEBSITE THAT ALLOWS INTUITIVE THINKING
-HUH WHAT?
^SAID THE ABOVE MAN
MUST BE MENTIONED
YES LIVEJOURNAL ALLOWS THE EXPRESSION OF FREEWILL AND THOUGHTS TO BE VIEWED BY THE MASSES
^WHAT U SAY?
^EXACTLY
HERE ARE POSTED MY THOUGHTS NOT THAT U WOULD WANT TO READ THEM FOR THEY BOGGLE THE MIND
-TOMMOROW I WORK OUT
-TOMORROW I WORK (AND GET PAID)
-WHO AM I? MUST FIGURE THIS OUT
-I MISS MY FRIENDS...
-I WISH I HAD SOME FRIENDS...
-SHOULDN'T HAVE BEEN SO MEAN
p.s.
GO U!
oh here's a comic strip i have taken quite a fancy to it
Adventures of My Pickle
Issue #1: Contemplating LIEF
p.s.s.s
^TOO MANY S's!!
I like the magenta layout... it reminds me of my favorite super hero MAGENTA AVENGER (more info later)
Current Mood: frgfgrlf
Current Music: tone deaf
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